Relationship Reflection: Balancing Deposits and Withdrawals

Relationship Aspect“Deposits” I made“Deposits” my partner madeEqual? Fair Contribution?
Timee.g. 2 years long distance, stayed with him and callede.g. 2 years long distance, stayed with me and calledFair
Emotional Support e.g. I listened to him and offered advice or support e.g. he listened to me and partially cared about what I said Unequal–I listened and cared more
Family/Friendse.g. Introduced him to my friends; spoke very highly of him to everyoneN/AUnequal—we always saw my friends
Sex/Affectione.g. I had sex even when I did not feel like it; I thought he was hote.g. He told me I was attractive and wanted to please meFair
Giftse.g. I knitted him a sweatere.g he bought me a bicycle when mine was stolenUnfair? He never wore the sweater
Attention/Communicatione.g. I wrote long, loving letters when we were aparte.g. he wrote long, loving letters and came to visit meUnequal—he traveled the extra miles
Chores/helpN/AN/A 
Kids (if applicable)N/AN/A 
Moneye.g. We always took turns paying; I lived at home to pay school loanse.g. He paid half of anything, and lived at home to pay school loansFair
Fun/Humore.g. I was silly and like to use voices to pretend we were other peoplee.g. he sometimes made jokesUnequal—he was too serious
Relationship Aspect“Withdrawals” I made“Withdrawals” my partner madeEqual? Fair Demand?
Timee.g. I only allowed him to see me 3 nights per week because I was busy with work and schoolN/AUnfair—I was too rigid with my schedule
Emotional Supporte.g. I needed a lot of emotional supportN/AUnfair—I needed his support and understanding much more than he needed mine
Family/Friendse.g. he never came over to my house (did not like my family)e.g. his Mom did not like me, but I went to his house all the time anywayUnfair—I wanted him to come to my house more
Sex/Affectione.g. I hooked up with someone else ☹N/AUnfair—I cheated
GiftsN/AN/A 
Attention/Communicatione.g. I wanted him to listen to all parts of my life/selfe.g. there were many parts of him hidden to meUnequal
Chores/helpN/AN/A 
Kids (if applicable)N/AN/A 
MoneyN/AN/A 
Fun/Humore.g. I sometimes made him the butt of my jokes when with friendsN/AUnfair—I needed to be more mature

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